Greetings,

Today’s Lady In Waiting is about being around Royalty/Nobility. some people get totally freaked out around them, but they are people, too, just like you and me.


How to Approach and Attend Royalty/Nobility. “ I can’t talk to her, she’s the Queen!”
(Yes, I have actually heard that.)

Yes you can talk to her, she’s the Queen! That’s part of being Queen. I have found that Queen’s, Princesses, and Landed Baronesses want to meet their populace, especially if you’re on their Court or Guard. The Queen wants to feel comfortable with her supporters. That’s just what you are or will be, a supporter. You must get over your hat-phobia (fear of anyone wearing a shiny, pointy brass thing on their head). You won’t do them or yourself any good if you can’t even say hello. Knowing how to approach them may be the first step to a lot of fun for all of you.

Bowing/Curtsying, Just the Facts, Ma’am!

There are many different styles on bowing and curtsying. The basic bow is remove your hat and bend at the waist.

The basic curtsy is put one leg behind the other and dip as is appropriate for the situation or your knees, with your head bowed slightly. (This is covered more in depth in the Courtly Graces posts.)

Depending on the Situation, no, not the one with the abs…

There are different situations you need to be aware of at all times when approaching Royalty. Are they in a large or small group, by themselves, on the Thrones, in a Royal Ready Room? Have they sent you on an errand, are you checking in for your shift, or are you talking to them for the first time?

First and foremost, if you are within about 10 feet of any Royal it is appropriate to bow/curtsy/nod, even if they don’t see you. Someone will always see you. (Trust me on this one.) It will get back to your Baron & Baroness if not go up the chain of command, especially if you’re the only one who did it. You get imaginary bonus points for this, even if it’s in your own head.

Urgency Prevails – Large Groups

If your Royalty are in a large group of people and it is an urgent matter; by all means you may interrupt. (Urgent means one of their children is bleeding, or has broken a bone and needs to go to the hospital, or someone got stabbed and the cops are on the way.)

INTERRUPT NICELY! Excuse your way through the group from behind Their Majesties, and go through the current court or guard member who is attending. If at all possible, do not disturb the bulk of the group. If the matter is of a private nature let the court or guard member know and tell only Their Majesties. If it is something that the other court or guard members can know about, tell them and they can alert Their Majesties.

When Their Majesties turn to talk to you, you should always bow/curtsy/nod before you tell them your business (unless it is their children needing to go to the hospital. Most will prefer you not to bow at that particular moment.). If the matter is not urgent, do not interrupt, just catch them later.

Urgency Prevails – Small Groups

If your Royalty are in a small group or with just a couple of people (not court or guard members) go through the other court/guard members again to reach Their Majesties.

If you are not on the court or guard, it is customary to stand just outside earshot (about 5 to 10 feet away) and in the line of site of the people you would like to speak to. This goes for anyone.

When they see you, you may flag them down if you feel it is appropriate, otherwise just be patient. They will come over to you as soon as they can. Remember to bow/curtsy (if appropriate). If it is an urgent matter INTERRUPT NICELY, and apologize to the entire group for interrupting.

Alone Time

If your Royalty is alone, approach with severe caution. There is usually a good reason they are alone. They may have need of a private moment. If it is not an urgent matter, stand where one or both can see you, but out of hearing range. They will motion you over, or come to you. Be patient, it may take a while. If you feel at all uncomfortable, leave. If it is an urgent matter, INTERRUPT NICELY.

We will continue this next week.

Hopefully Helpful,
Hrefna